'The Colbert Report' recap for 2/27/2012

By John-Paul Helk,
The Colbert Report Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Movies That Are Destroying America - Oscar Edition - "A Separation" & "The Lorax"
www.colbertnation.com
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Steven Colbert started off Monday night's episode talking about the Oscars, saying we “have outsourced our self-congratulatory stroke-fest,” mentioning The Artist, calling it an “outrage” that it won best picture. He spoke of how our ticket price for movies includes sound and lighting costs, saying that it they are not utilized to dangerous levels that he doesn't feel he got his money's worth. This is why, he said, the best movie of the year was Transformers: Dark of the Moon. He blamed the “liberal elitist snobs” for shunning it due to its lack of certain aspects, such as plot. He then created a silent black and white version of the movie, and asked for an Oscar. He also mentioned A Separation, an Iranian film. It won the award for best foreign language film. He joked that the Oscar was the last piece Iran needed to complete their nuclear bombs. He did however give the Academy a chance for redemption, if they but give The Lorax a nod next year, since is has more than 70 product tie-ins. He showed the commercial in which the movie is used to promote Mazda's CX5 crossover SUV. He encouraged more companies to use tie-ins to the movie, using a Suess-esque rhyme to entice them.

He then spoke about the Michigan Republican Primary, and Mitt Romney's attempt to garner votes by delivering a speech at Detroit's Ford Field. Unfortunately for Romney, the venue hurt him rather than helped him. 65,000 empty seats dwarfed the 1200 supporters who showed up. But, Colbert said, he connected with those seats, since they are both “plastic and uncomfortable.” Romney also mentioned tree height, yet again, as opposed to President Barack Obama who appears unconcerned with such an important issues. Romney also went to see the Daytona 500. Not because he follows the sport closely, but because he knows a number of Nascar team owners.

Rick Santorum on the other hand, is already focusing his efforts on Obama. He was shown calling Obama a “snob” for saying he wants every American to go to college. Santorum believed it was an affront to the hardworking people who haven't been “indoctrinated” by “some liberal college professor.” Colbert voiced his agreement with this sentiment, saying we're not all as lucky as Obama who was “handed a golden ticket to Harvard...by being the bi-racial son of a single mother on food stamps.” Santorum also warned against the dangers of college, saying that “62% of kids who enter college with some sort of faith commitment leave without it.” Colbert said he wasnt sure if that statistic was real or not, but he would take it on faith that it was. Colbert mentioned how Santorum himself is the perfect example of this, having earned a Bachelors, an MBA, and a law degree. His years of college obviously destroyed his religious convictions.

His guest was Peggielene Bartels, an American woman who became king of a village in Ghana. King Peggi was born in Ghana, became an American citizen, and was then chosen to rule after her uncle's death. She is a king as opposed to a queen because the two offices are more like president and vice president respectively than the married gender locked roles typically associated with king and queen. King Peggi promoted her efforts to raise money for clean water and ambulances for her village.

 
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