Family Guy Season 11 Episode 2: ‘Ratings Guy’

By Luis Vargas,
Peter reigns as ‘Nielsen God’

In this week’s episode of Family Guy the show pokes fun at every other show on television. The Griffins are chosen by the Nielsen Company (they track television ratings across the nation) to be a part of the population they track.

The selection is Peter’s delight as he recalls that he never gets chosen for anything. Viewers then witnessed a flashback to a school shooting where the shooter saw Peter walking by on campus grounds, but decided instead to shoot the person walking by next to him.

After reporter Tom Tucker stops by the Griffins’ house to ask for Peter’s viewership Peter realizes that since what he watches is being tracked he has some power. He convinces Tom to shave off his infamous mustache just to guarantee Peter’s viewership.

Peter than realizes that control television he must somehow control the ratings. He steals one hundred Nielsen boxes so that whatever he watches will be represented as 100 people. Peter wants television to do exactly what he wants so with his newfound viewership power he holds television hostage.

His first attempt to change television is toward Mad Men. He calls Jon Hamm to give him his demands. Hamm refuses, but after seeing the ratings dropped he and many other shows cave into his demands. Below is a list of what television looks like when Peter Griffin is in charge.

1. Mad Men’sDon Draper engages in a light saber duel with an advertising executive while the guitarist from Kiss plays a solo in the background of the office.
2. Breaking Bad is on roller skates.
3. NBC’s Dateline reveals the killer within the first five seconds of the show.
4. Late show host David Letterman reads a bedtime story to Peter on his shows through the television airwaves.
5. The policemen on Cops no longer use guns they use bananas.
6. Keeping up with the Kardashians is now Creeping Up on the Kardashians a show where someone creeps on the sisters to scare them.

As you might have imagined many viewers in the city of Quahog were upset. Joe led an angry mob to Peter’s front porch where they threw a beer bottle at his face. The whole town turns on him; including his closet friends.

Peter saves the day by making a trip to Hollywood to order televisions’ most famous executives and producers to make the television programs we enjoy today.

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