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On Monday's episode of The Late Show with David Letterman, guests included Mike and Molly star, Michelle McCarthy, David Morrissey and David Byrne and St. Vincent.
To start off the show on the right foot, David Letterman joked about Hillary Clinton’s double vision thick glasses, x-ray security on New York City’s streets and a joke about Subway’s foot long sub being half an inch too small. As he joked, he said a New Jersey man was suing subway for not giving him a 12-inch sub, later revealing that the man was Governor Chris Christie.
Beyoncé was also a topic as Letterman laughed sarcastically that she was in big trouble and could be going to jail- for lip-syncing at the Inauguration. He ended that joke by saying that we had a lip-syncing President who lip-synced Dick Cheney. He ended this segment by showing a clip from 60 Minutes where President Obama and Hillary Clinton were shown dazing into each other’s eyes in an awkward romantic moment.
His Top 10 question segment was about Iran sending a monkey into space that returned intact.
Questions To Ask Before Sending Your Monkey Into Space:
10.) Is this one of those scams where they steal your monkey
9.) Will my monkey know how to rehydrate a banana
8.) Better off in space than living with someone who owns a monkey
7.) How is it that my monkey has a more impressive career than mine
6.) Would it be easier to send a guy in a monkey suit
5.) What’s the catch
4.) Will he miss daddy
3.) Is the space capsule monkey proof
2.) Can I get a loaner monkey
1.) Is it a one-way ticket or round trip
In the second segment, Letterman’s guest was Melissa McCarthy, star of Mike and Molly, as well as Identity Thief, which opens in theaters on Feb. 8.
McCarthy is an Academy Award nominated actress best known for her comedy chops.
McCarthy and Letterman shared horror stories about their children. She went into detail about her two daughters and one of their escapades in the holiday aisle of a store that caused a scene. McCarthy chased her child around the store frantically when her daughter wanted to go to the holiday aisle but went running around the store instead. A guy and a girl in their 20’s had to help her find her daughter. She jokingly admitted that she has ‘that kid” that parents are afraid to have. After sharing stories about their kids, Letterman and McCarthy spoke about her nomination. She shared that she was in disbelief and felt like someone was going to tell her they were kidding about her nomination. Working with Jason Bateman was a blast in their fun scenes of Identity Thief. “It was kind of ridiculous every day. He really makes me laugh,” she said. McCarthy also shared that things got weird for her at last year’s Academy Awards.
Letterman’s next guest was David Morrissey from The Walking Dead. Originally from Liverpool, England, he studied drama at the Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts in London. He explained that Liverpool is a commercial city that takes the arts very seriously and that the best thing was that they didn’t think he was weird for wanting to be an actor. The only thing that was weird was that he didn’t want to be in a band-since The Beatles originated from Liverpool. He starred in a hit UK series called One Summer at the age of 16, which really became his calling card and proof that he had worked before. Morrissey shared that one of the best things about being on the show is that his son and his friends love the series and he can get free gifts. Letterman joked about the show’s zombie theme. Morrissey responded by explaining that it’s about human survival, not just zombies. It’s about what you would do when you’re up against it. We don’t really know until it happens.
Musical guest, David Byrne and St. Vincent gave a dramatic and unique musical performance to bring the show to an end.