‘The Colbert Report’ Recap 2/14/13

By Ricky Riley,

This episode focuses on the history of Valentine’s Day, the Financial Meltdown and features guest Gavin Newsome.

When it comes to holidays, Stephen Colbert is an originalist.

Instead of celebrating Valentine’s Day, celebrate Lupercalia.

It was the roman day of fertility taking place in mid-February.

It was named after the she wolf that suckled the founders of Rome, Remus and Romulus.

The problem with today’s young people is that they lack sufficient wolf teat. Then Colbert goes on to describe the holiday.

It is a festival where people would sacrifice a goat to Venus, wear its skin and whip women in the streets with a leather throng.

Getting into the meat of the show, Colbert reminds us that the financial meltdown happened five years ago, and that some Maddow blazing wearing clown holes can’t get over it.

The government has finally grown a pair by going after Standard and Poors. The company gave high credit ratings to bad loans. Colbert calls that bullsh*t.

He jokes that Standard and Poors has given that a high credit rating as well.

Colbert discusses the subject with David Leonhardt, a financial journalist and author of Here’s the Deal.

Banks are still too big to fail and they are apparently too big to jail.

Colbert asks the question: do laws apply to banks?

If this was any other country, we would line up the bankers and shoot them. America is a great nation.

In the b block of the show, Colbert reports that one banker has been brought to justice.

68-year-old Richard Eggers from West Des Moines, Iowa, who was in the white collar trenches at Wells Fargo, was fired because he made fake dimes out of cardboard at a Laundromat when he was young.

Eggers was only a loan claims reporter who had little to no power.

Shelia Bair, former president of FCC, says that it is a little extreme. Wells Fargo does not tolerate employees with a criminal history.

In the final moments of the show, California Lt. Governor Gavin Newsom sits down with Stephen to discuss his new book Citizenville: How to Take the Town Square Digital and Reinvent Government.

Colbert calls him out. This is a bunch of bullsh*t. Why do we need to localize and reinvent government?

California is going in the toilet and education is not free and the state’s debt is piling up.

Newsome disagrees respectfully. California is a state where there are great universities. There are more Nobel laureates than any other state and the debt problem is being solved. Progress is happening. He does not give up on the state.

Then Colbert eases the tension by calling Newsome a handsome man.

This episode was the funniest and most entertaining of the week. The Colbert Report airs on Comedy Central.



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