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Cutlery is taken to new heights in the Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer. Gone are the days of squished banana pieces, and in are the days of perfectly even bites. For only $2.65, you can get this revolutionary plastic tool.
What’s that you say? Knives were invented at least two-and-a-half million years ago? Pish-posh.
The Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer comes in a cute banana shape. It’s dishwasher safe, it allows you to slice a banana is one motion, and according to its Amazon description, it’s “faster, safer than using a knife.” So take that conventional silverware!
If you think I’m overselling it, listen to what Mrs Toledo has to say about the Hutzler 571.
“What can I say about the 571B Banana Slicer that hasn't already been said about the wheel, penicillin, or the iPhone.... this is one of the greatest inventions of all time.”
As one of the greatest inventions of all time, the Hutzler 571 does so much more than just slicing. It gives you more free time to pursue your passions.
“No longer consumed by seething anger and animosity towards thick-skinned yellow fruit, I was able to concentrate on my love of theatre and am writing a musical play about two lovers from rival gangs that just try to make it in the world. I think I'll call it South Side Story.” — SW3K
It solves family problems.
“No longer shall I have to disturb my families' slumber using my laser guided compound mitre saw to cut precision banana slices!” — John The Carpenter
It’s the perfect gift for a loved one!
“Ordering one for my nephew who's in the air force in California. He's been using an old slinky to slice his banana's. He should really enjoy this product!” — Uncle Pookie
Of course, there is always one dissenter when an invention so ground breaking comes along.
“I tried the banana slicer and found it unacceptable. As shown in the picture, the slices is curved from left to right. All of my bananas are bent the other way.” — J. Anderson
However, I think we can all agree that this last review is a user error.
Flawless banana slices (and undying happiness) are only a click away with the Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer!