Dear Abby shuts down homophobic Tampa couple with gay neighbors

By Daniel S Levine,

A Dear Abby response to an ‘unhappy Tampa’ couple has gone viral. The couple could not understand why their neighbors wouldn’t go to parties at their home when they excluded the two gay couples in the neighborhood.

In their letter to Abby, the couple said they moved from a “conservative community” where everyone was the same. When they first arrived, they were welcomed at parties, but when they hosted their own party, no one showed, since they excluded the gay and lesbian couples in the area. Since then, they haven’t been invited to other parties.

The wife, who wrote the letter, said that they “do not approve of their lifestyle choices.”

“While I understand the phrase ‘when in Rome,’ I don't feel we should have to compromise our values just to win the approval of our neighbors,” the woman wrote. “But really, who is the true bigot here? Would you like to weigh in?”

Abby’s polite response was direct. First, she shot down the woman’s assumption that being gay is a choice. “Gay people don't choose to be gay; they are born that way. They can't change being gay any more than you can change being heterosexual,” Abby wrote.

Abby wrote that she found it “interesting” that the couple would complain about being excluded when they did the same to their neighbor.

In conclusion, Abby essentially said that it would be best for the couple to find a new place to live where everyone is the same. “But if you interact only with people like yourselves, you will have missed a chance for growth, which is what you have been offered here,” Abby wrote. “Please don't blow it.”

The Huffington Post notes that this is actually the second time in recent months that Abby has written a response to an anti-gay writer. In November, she told a mother that wanted to change her son's sexuality, "If you cannot learn to accept him as he is, it might be safest for him to live elsewhere."



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