Dancing with the Stars Finale, Part 2

There is a final dance for each of the contestants, but, of course, we are given basically 1 hour and 15 minutes of fluffer. We get a recap of what happened last night. There will be a lot of recaps tonight. They play up the fact that everyone did well and how everyone worked hard.

We get a clip of whatever happened to Cloris. She plays a disheveled bum and eventually just Wonder Woman spins around and interviews people about who they were voting for. She dances around with some and with one she holds the microphone upside down. She then mistakes the phrase "dawg" and laughs.

Alicia Keys has the first performance of the night. After some intense research I found out that both Alicia's and Miley Cyrus's performance was taped yesterday (possibly why the shots of Miley in the background were the same shot twice later on). Nevertheless, I appreciate Alicia for doing some dance moves. You traditionally see her behind a piano and it's nice to see that she's coordinated. She eventually goes back behind the piano but it's still great.

We get a big recap of all the contestants. For week one and two, we're reminded that Cloris was crazy, Jeffery Ross was poked in the eye, and Ted McGinley was on the show. Weeks later I am saddened that Misty May was eliminated so early. Jeffrey is back dancing his quickstep. It's disappointing that Edyta got a dud partner, but I'm happy she got to sub for Julianne. This dance is a lot better than I ever remembered too. Ted McGinley dances his fox-trot and I always liked his drive and desire to be on the show. He's one of those contestants who looked like he was having fun the whole time. He's still a little stiff, but he's happy. Kim Kardashian dances her mambo and she still looks bad. I think she improved her movement a little bit, but I think it's because she knows that it doesn't really matter anyway.

We now have weeks 3 & 4. Cloris was still crazy, Cody played with a leg and I'm still disappointed by the loss of Misty May. Week four was great for most and a miss mostly for Cloris and Rocco. Misty May and Maks are back, she's able to walk, but is disappointed that she has to watch on a TV. They get cutesy with Tom. Rocco and Karina dance their mambo. He still is gawky. I also appreciate the fact that Karina tried to make a sequence of moves that tried to minimize the awkwardness of Rocco.

Before commercial we get a preview of Cloris going crazy. They call it "Dirty Dancing: The Retirement Years." Week 5 had the new dances introduced this year. I see that the West Coast Swing was ignored the whole time. The hip-hop dance was questionable for most. Julianne's surgery was put in place, Cloris was still crazy. Also, Michael Flatley was amazing. We have an interview with Toni Braxton; she apparently has recovered from a few surgeries.

"Clorky" decide to do their tango. Out of all their dances, their tango was the one that probably had the most content (dance-wise). It's still dramatic and a little disturbing seeing someone who could be my grandmother flirting with an older gentleman. She gets a standing ovation. She equates the dancing with pregnancy. She isn't doing the Broadway play, Spamalot, because it is being canned.

Susan Lucci does the paso doble. She is more emotional in this performance than she ever was during the show. She also seems less frail than she ever did during the performances, not afraid to actually go for it. A little late, don't you think?

Maurice and Cheryl decide to do the salsa. There is a little bit of drunken camera to remind us that this show is actually (on the whole) live. The salsa is quite a fun dance and I hope that this and the jitterbug make it back in future seasons. Maurice may not be the winner, but I'm sure he got his chicken dinner.

Weeks 7 and 8 brought us a questionable dance without shoes, a bad group dance, and Edyta's substitution. The solos were great for Brooke and Maurice, but mostly awkward for Cody.

Jeffrey Ross is back to roast the remaining contestants. Before he gets to the roasting, he talks about his eye and how somehow Cloris beat him. Warren to Jeffrey has great boobs. Brooke is pointed out that she has too many kids, we finally hear some gay jokes about Lance (something I was convinced that ABC was tip-toeing around especially after the whole Grey's Anatomy situation) relating Lance to Clay Aiken, and Warren is still somehow fat after weeks and weeks of performances.

The youngest contestant, Cody, almost made it to the final three. We're reminded that Brooke choked in the semi-finals. Cody performs his jitterbug with Julianne. Although I know it's supposed to be an I Love Lucy theme, I could see the performance on Happy Days as well. Cody successfully slides between Julianne's legs. I'm always afraid someone will miss the slide and kick their partner.

We're given another rundown of the competition. Lance gets words like edgy and sleeper. Warren is called light-footed, has charisma, and is entertaining. Brooke says she has the best technique. The last dances remind us that they need to be focused on the end. Looking at what they were wearing during the editing, Warren and Brooke must have changed their last dance last minute because in one three shot, Lance was in his sailor outfit, but Brooke looked to be in her samba and Warren looked like he was doing the tango or paso.

We're given a weird Superman opening that hypes up the three remaining contestants. There is smoke and fabrics. Why wasn't this shown in the beginning of the show? Instead, it's put in almost an hour and 10 minutes into the show.

Warren & Kym - The montage shows a lot of improvement of Warren. He is surprisingly light on his feet. He was always busy flying around, but he stayed dedicated to Kym. They have decided to do the hustle. It seems like Warren is lighter on his feet on this performance and he definitely has improved from the last time that he did the performance. He is looser and looks like he's enjoying this even more this performance. Len tells Warren that he is the people's champion. Bruno calls him a crafty hustler. Carrie Ann called them cool and loved the fact that Warren inspired people to get up and dance. The scores are 9, 9, and 9. They have an 80 out of 90 without the audience's vote being counted. I'm still disappointed they attempted a disco in the finals after Stacy Kiebler flopped on hers.

Lance & Lacey - The progression of Lance was interesting. He was happy that they were edgier and did what they wanted. Both Lance and Lacey have grown up. There is a funny simile of Lance coming out as a butterfly. They do the infamous shoe jitterbug in hopes that a shoe doesn't fall off. The performance is still uplifting and bouncy. Lance sometimes can have this crazy look on his face. Lacey looks like she messed up a lift, but they recover very well. The rest of the performance is clean and the two become emotional. Bruno calls Lance a great showman. Carrie Ann pointed out the struggle with the lift; she applauds them being so edgy. Len knows that Lance deserves being here after a strong showing the last few weeks. The scores are: 9, 9, and 10. An 81 out of 90.

Brooke & Derek - They point out that Brooke has improved a lot and then they added the technique. They have a lot of respect for both of them. They dance the Viennese waltz. It's almost like their swan song/last dance. It's graceful, beautiful, and clean. Brooke has this silly grin on her face, but it's still good. In that wonderful ending, Brooke kisses her daughters. One of Brooke's daughters makes the most awkward stare into the camera. Carrie Ann is in tears because she's so fantastic. Len still thinks that the dance was the best dance of the season. Bruno calls it amazing as well. The scores are: 10, 10, and 10. The last dance is the perfect score. It's a 88 out of 90. I wonder who's gonna win?

We get a final wave from Kristi Yamaguchi. The third place team is Lance & Lacey. I guess Lance couldn't beat Joey Fatone. He talks about being excited the whole time. Lacey thanks him for everything. It's a little sad that the two don't get a final dance.

We have Miley Cyrus next and you could clearly see she's grown a little. The dancers are having a fun time. Miley flirts with the judges. The strobing lights probably gave someone a seizure.

The two talk positives about each other. Derek calls the competition "close" even though there is an eight point disparity between the two. Tom talks to the eliminated people and he points out that they did better and how everyone shouts out their projects. Kim is the only one to shout out a project.

We've finally got to the final judging. Brooke is still technical; Warren is still entertaining. This season's champions are Brooke & Derek. Another front-runner wins the trophy. I'm not sure who is more excited: Brooke or Derek. Mark, Corky and Julianne quickly rush Derek and they both get lifted up, somehow Corky is maintaining his balance of Brooke the whole time.