Peter Falk - Actor/Author

By: Dominick A. Miserandino

Peter Falk was the star of Columbo, which has aired regularly and intermittently from 1971 to 2003.

The show, which turned the formulaic detective story inside out by taking the killer’s viewpoint, earned Falk five Emmy awards and one Golden Globe. Outside of Columbo, Falk has starred on Broadway, several films, including the 1963 hit, It’s a Mad Mad Mad Mad World, and has been up for an Academy Award twice, for roles in Murder, Inc. and Pocketful of Miracles. Here, he talks about his new memoir, Just One More Thing, and also about his unique insight into the inner workings of Columbo’s mind.


DM: Well, what got you started or interested in writing it all down, your whole life story there? Let’s tell the basic story.

PF: Let me start off by saying that I say in the foreword that when I was a kid, an autobiography was the life of Abe Lincoln.

DM: (laughs)

PF: This, what you’re reading now, is not an autobiography. You might not know it, but I was never president of the United States.

DM: (laughs) Okay.

PF: What I’m saying is that today every fifth person is an icon. I go into a delicatessen in Beverly Hills, and sitting in the next booth are four icons eating pastrami sandwiches. So this is not an autobiography.

DM: What do you consider it?

PF: And that’s the next question: so what is this?

DM: Exactly!

PF: And I don’t know. I know one thing though—I know it’s not an autobiography.

DM: Exactly.

PF: I know they’re gonna think that. And I think it’s important to the reader that the development of this character, Colombo, will impress you.

DM: Alright, is your life entangled with Colombo, no matter what now? Because it seems you can’t mention one without the other sometimes.

PF: That’s really true. Let me put it this way: why did it take 12 years to become an actor? If I graduated from high school in ’45, why did I wait ’til 57?

DM: That’s a good question.

PF: That’s a good question, isn’t it?

DM: It’s a very good question!

PF: And in the book, I talk about why, and that all has to do with the fact that you can’t just summarize it in one thing.

DM: Okay.

PF: But it’s an interesting question, and I think also that it’s a good question. Everybody could ask the same question: how did I end up here? At one point in my life, what combination of things led to this? If one person frees an elephant, another person has a beauty salon, and I became an actor—how does that happen?

DM: Yeah.

PF: So I talk about that in the book. But I think that the chapters are an indication. Like there’s a chapter why I wasn’t in the …

DM: Laughs.

PF: Most of these stories are about a page … I got the book here in front of me, hold on one second.

DM: Okay.

PF: Jason Robards tells a good story. I think that story’s about a page and a half.

DM: So it sounds like your motive in writing, in a way, is simply to make people laugh.

PF: My motive? My motive in writing is to remember old stories that I heard when I’m sitting around with a bunch of actors and we’re in the bar and we’re all telling stories—and they’re all true.

DM: Did you find yourself laughing while writing it?

PF: Yes!

DM: You did?

PF: I did find myself laughing. And that was the big kick I got out of putting all of this down on paper, because I wanted to make sure people laugh. But I also wanted to make sure that the first sentence—the first paragraph—grabs their attention, so they’re not going to say, “Oh this is too long,” within a page or two. That’s what I was trying to do.

DM: Now, knowing that you enjoy having people laugh, I’m surprised your most well-known character is not necessarily a comedic character. I mean, yes Columbo’s funny, but that’s not like that’s the prime motive of Columbo. It has the mystery and the story behind it.

PF: Well, I think that if you had the mystery and had the story, but if the main character didn’t grab you, not because he was the smartest guy in the room, but because there was something about him that was interesting…different...off-the-wall…eccentric, it was the nature of that character. And I like to hope that Columbo was one of a kind—that he was up for auction.

DM: Yeah.

PF: He was this guy, and the only example I can come up with, is a guy with the brain of Sherlock Holmes dresses like the doorman.

DM: (laughs) Are you basically the same person as the character Columbo?

PF: Oh, I’ve often been asked that question.

DM: That’s why I wondered.

PF: And I answer it the same. No one is like the character Columbo. He’s one of a kind, absolutely one of a kind. Because he solved the crimes. Could I come up with the answers like he does? He sees things that other detectives don’t see, he smells things that other cops don’t smell. He hears things. That’s the Sherlock Holmes thing, you know.

DM: Okay.

PF: And everybody else is very concerned about what we want to look like. The thing about Columbo, when he walks into a room, a murderer is not concerned.

DM: Yeah.

PF: He’s not concerned with the fact that he looks like he’s not very formidable. He looks like a pushover, he looks like he’s dumb. That doesn’t bother him. That’s a rare thing that you feel comfortable in your own skin, that you don’t care about the impression that you’re making. He wasn’t nervous that he looks like he’s dumb. If he doesn’t look like he’s dumb, he looks like he’s ordinary. He certainly doesn’t look like a threat.

DM: Yeah.

PF: The guy commits a murder and the cop shows up, and the cop is so under-impressive, so ordinary. That was the thing that made Columbo comfortable, to look like he was not so bright.

DM: Are you comfortable in your own skin, like Columbo, that you don’t mind first impressions or what people initially see in you?

PF: No, I’m not. When I arrive in a room, I don’t want people to think I’m dumb. Why would I want that? (laughs) I think there’s a job somewhere, why would I want the guy who’s going to hire me to think, “This guy’s got no talent”?

DM: So, do you ever look at traits Columbo had and wish you had those traits?

PF: There are things about Columbo that I share with him. One of the things is that Columbo never shuts up about his wife.

DM: (laughs) Okay.

PF: And I do the same thing. My wife, and I do have a chapter where I write a letter to Columbo. “I take a backseat to no one in my appreciation of good cooks and homicide detectives, but I gotta be honest with you, lieutenant. When it comes to stories about your wife, mine are much better than yours.” And that’s true. I can certainly give you a quick example…alright, here’s one: Here in Beverly Hills there are tourist buses that go by, by the thousands. And the people on the bus want to see a celebrity, and the bus driver as he drives is looking for celebrities so that they can stop the bus and the people can take a picture of a celebrity. So now the bus is coming down the street and it’s approaching my house. I’m not there, but my wife is there. And what’s she doing? She’s concerned with the dog’s paw, because it’s got a thorn in it. And she wants to relieve the pain so she’s removing that thorn. Now the bus comes by and stops and the bus driver wants to strike up a conversation so the people can take their pictures. So he says, “Hi! How’s Peter?” And my wife says, “He died this morning.” And she goes back to the dog’s paw.

DM: Oh my God.

PF: That ended that conversation! And she went back to what she was interested in: the dog, the thorn, the paw. At that point, nobody else would think to bother her. “He died this morning.” That was the way to get rid of that bus.

DM: Yeah, I just realized that in the Columbo series, the wife is always referred to, but you never really see her.

PF: No, but you talk about her.

DM: (laughs) Why don’t we ever see her?

PF: Well, you could see her, but I think it’s much more interesting if everyone has their own vision of what that woman looked like. And all they know is she can cook. And Columbo likes to talk about her. And it’s much more interesting if each person has their own idea of who she is, what she looks like: Is she tall, is she short, is she fat, is she skinny, is she Italian, is she this, that, or the other thing? What do you gain by showing her? You tell me, what would you gain by seeing her?

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