Flavor of Love: Season 2

When people browse through my movie collection, they often compliment my variety of independent, foreign and lesser-known classics. However, I rarely ever receive the same compliments for "Flavor of Love: Season 2." Instead, my friends shoot me looks of disdain and disgust when they see Flavor Flav's shiny grill smiling at them from the front cover, and they look down on me and my love for this clock-wearing man. Well, I am through putting up with their snide comments and smug smiles, and I will explain once and for all why I have "Flavor of Love: Season 2" sitting right next to my copies of "Singin' in the Rain" and "American Beauty."

For those unfamiliar with the show, "Flavor of Love" is a reality show that aired on VH1. The show follows rapper Flavor Flav of Public Enemy on his quest to find love. He invites a number of scantily-clad women to hang out with him in a mansion, gives them all nicknames like "Bootz" and "Toastee" and occasionally hosts competitions where the prize is usually some one-on-one time with Flav himself. Of course, almost all the girls are coo-coo for Cocoa Puffs, and they are constantly fighting with each other and talking about each other behind their backs. Every episode ends with a clock ceremony, much like the rose ceremonies on "The Bachelor." Flavor Flav hands out clocks to the girls that he wants to keep around, and all the rest are sent away with the catchphrase, "Your time is up!"

Perhaps the biggest twist of season two is the return of Tiffany, better known to fans of the show as New York. New York was one of the final two girls in season one, and Flav chose Hoopz instead, leaving New York brokenhearted. He invited New York back during season two to help him assess the girls and find out who was "really here for Flav." At the next clock ceremony, however, Flav shocked all of the girls when he asked New York to stay and give their relationship another chance. The return of New York is the cherry on top of the sundae of television awesomeness that is "Flavor of Love: Season 2."

First of all, I own the second season of "Flavor of Love" because it is a consistently entertaining show. There is never a dull moment in his fake television set mansion/harem. One minute, girls are doing body shots off of each other and questioning each other's sexuality. The next minute, a girl is pooping on the floor. (Yes, a girl actually pooped on the floor, and Flav kept her around for two more weeks. Interested yet?)

Flavor Flav, a grown man who wears gold chains and clocks around his neck, is the funniest and sanest person in the house, and he offers a hilarious commentary throughout the show. He speaks affectionately about all the girls and offers such quips as, "You could eat a picnic off of that a**!"

Secondly, the producers of "Flavor of Love" have put together an ethnically diverse group of women who together create a melting pot of crazy on the show. There are white, black, Latino and Asian nutjobs. Young girls watching the show will be able to relate to at least one of Flav's potential love interests, whether it is Krazy's fame-whoring by promoting her music on the show or Buckwild's struggle with being white but "talking black." The creators of "Flavor of Love" can be proud that some little girl will watch New York on "Flavor of Love" and learn that she too can aspire to be "The HBIC, The Head B**** In Charge."

Finally, the second season of "Flavor of Love" is at its heart a story of unrequited love. New York, a woman who never fell out of love with Flav, got a second chance to win him back, and she lives by the old saying that all is fair in love and war. She will do anything and everything to hold onto Flav now that she has a second chance, even if she looks completely insane to everyone around her. Every woman, even if they won't admit it, has gone nutters or wanted to go nutters over a guy. There is an ex-boyfriend who they still love with a stupid and undignified love, and they would like nothing better than to track down his uglier new girlfriend and tear her weave out. Not all women will admit that they have such desires, but some will choose to watch "Flavor of Love" and live vicariously through New York.

My only complaint about season two was that it lacked a big blow-out moment between the girls. Season one set the bar unreasonably high when Pumpkin spit on New York, a television moment of epic proportions. There were a few small spats between the girls and a memorable fight between Flavor Flav and New York's crazy mother, but there was nothing in season two that could top Pumpkin hawking a loogie on the insanely-in-love (or just plain insane) New York.

"Flavor of Love" is a television reality show that offered something for everyone and told a tri-fold story: a man searching for love, a woman who has been given a second chance at love and a house full of women fighting desperately for their fifteen minutes of fame and losing every last scrap of dignity in the process. "Flavor of Love" shows the best and worst (though mostly worst) of humanity, and the show serves as a reminder of what happens when we let our basic urges take over. Sure, we might get our fifteen minutes of fame if we follow New York's lead, but in the process, we will lose ourselves as human beings. We will transform from humans with self control and the ability to reason into a screaming banshee in a miniskirt. "Flavor of Love" is a parable and a reminder to me to keep my inner crazy inside.

Plus, did I mention that a girl poops on the floor?