Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
On the rare occasions when much-maligned action director Michael Bay gets things right in his movies, the results can be spectacularly entertaining. His debut feature, "The Rock," benefited from tight direction, well-crafted action sequences and solid writing. 2007's silver-screen "Transformers" film also managed to fill its summer blockbuster role with economy and panache, satisfying its dedicated cult fan-base while making for a dynamic theatrical experience. "Transformers" certainly had its flaws, but it never once stopped being fun.
Unfortunately, the same cannot be said of the sequel. "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" essentially represents what happens when Bay and his screenwriting team fail to understand what made the first film enjoyable and load its successor with as many of these least-appealing elements as possible. Fights between massive shape-shifting robots, the heart and soul of the "Transformers" franchise, are reduced to make room for plodding exposition, obnoxious ancillary characters and showcasing sub-par acting.
The story picks up where the prior film left off. Sam Witwicky, played by Shia LaBeouf, having successfully vanquished the evil robot Megatron, voiced by Hugo Weaving, attempts to lead as normal a life as possible given his status as savior of mankind. While packing to leave for Anonymous State University, Sam discovers a shard of the mystical AllSpark, the alien device he used to defeat Megatron. Upon touching the sliver, the electronics in Sam's house come to malevolent life, attacking him like the bastard children of the toy troops in "Small Soldiers." During this encounter, Sam also gains some poorly explained mystical knowledge that could possibly spell eternal life for the Transformers and doom for the human race.
From there, "Fallen" essentially becomes a linear adventure through a "National Treasure" meets "A Beautiful Mind" via "Holes" storyline as Sam, his girlfriend Mikaela, played by Megan Fox, and his annoying college roommate Leo, played by Ramon Rodriguez, attempt to avoid capture by a resurrected Megatron and his evil robot army, the Deceptacons. Sam and company must also outrun the governments and militaries of the world, who are promised safety from the Deceptacons' wrath in exchange for Sam and his gobbledy-gook-rich brain. Along the way, insufferable human and android characters are introduced, poorly written characters attempt to advance the plot and giant robot fights are largely ignored to focus on the grating human element.
The 2007 "Transformers" film was justifiably criticized for having the CGI robots out-act the actual actors. However, this was not a major problem because the movie kept its focus exactly where it needed to be: on the Transformers, the titular characters with a massive built-in audience who ensured the film would be profitable. The human members of the cast were merely there to lend a helping hand when the plot needed advancing or the viewer needed a relatable sack of flesh and blood to connect with when fighting was not happening onscreen.
The opposite is true of this film. The human actors take center stage, and the movie is poorer for it. Sam and the other protagonists are so paper-thin and poorly written that it's impossible to care what happens to them, while the story is such a confusing maelstrom of half-assed sci fi logic that it translates to being little more than an incoherent ringer the characters must find their way through to reach an underwhelming payoff. The audience, regrettably, goes through these same trials, and the reward is even less substantial.