Weezer (Red Album)
Reviews of Weezer's recent albums have been mixed at best. But by "recent albums," fans mean their last three . . . out of five total. Despite many hit singles since, many regard the band's first two albums, Weezer [the Blue Album] and Pinkerton, as the herald of '90s pre-emo and wonder with every subsequent release if the band will recapture the magic of their short-lived glory days.
Four albums on, they still haven't. Having been criticized for pandering to Top 40 radio in recent efforts, the group takes plenty of risks on their sixth disc, the third to be self-titled, Weezer [the Red Album]. It turns out, however, that Weezer trying to be experimental is even worse than Weezer trying to be mainstream. Single "Pork and Beans" is the most straight-forward rock song of the bunch and it's also the album's biggest success. With big Beck-channeling verses building to a bigger shout-along chorus, the crunchy jingle seemed a return for the band to the catchy tongue-in-cheek fun with which they made their name.
Anyone hoping that "Pork and Beans" was an indicator of the full album was largely disappointed. Though there are several other straight-ahead rock tracks, they seem half-hearted by comparison, as if the band feels guilty about playing music so generic. "Dreamin'" is just a rewrite of Pinkerton's "Why Bother?" and the riffs in "Troublemaker" plod along so painfully that when it's over, you remember nothing about the song except the headache it left behind.
The album's experiments ? that is, all the other songs ? are a mixed bag. Which isn't to say any of them are actually good. Some are so bad they're funny though, while others are just bad. The album's strangest track ? and one of the most appealing ? comes in "The Greatest Man That Ever Lived (Variations on a Shaker Theme)," ten songs combined into one with little rhyme or reason to the grouping. Some of these song fragments are catchy, more are awful, all are hilarious. The one thread tying them together is an insipid melody borrowed from "'Tis a Gift to Be Simple," but circling around that are Gregorian Chant harmonies, '70s rock solos, and a spoken message from Cuomo about what a badass he is.
"Everybody Get Dangerous" follows a similar theme, from a band about as dangerous as mayonnaise. The original crying emo kid, Cuomo, here abandons his Buddy Holly glasses and scarf for bling and a do-rag by writing a faux-rap song. It goes without saying that it's horrendous, but that's only because it's trying to be. Assuming this is all meant in ironic jest, these gangsta jams are hilarious. If they're terrible, at least the band is having fun making them that way.
It's when the band does seem to be taking itself seriously that the album truly bottoms out. "The Angel and the One" details Cuomo's quest for spiritual fulfillment before the song degenerates into an endlessly repeated "Peace, shalom" refrain. Even scientologist Tom Cruise couldn't get more holier-than-thou pretentious. And though other band members step in to help with frontman duties, writing and singing a song each, none of them can sing, and none have much to say.
Weezer fans just can't get a break. Waiting since 1996 for a return to the classic Weezer sound, their hopes were raised by the "Pork and Beans" single, only to be dashed once again with an album so bad it could be shelved in the comedy section. The band seems to be floundering around for any idea and, though a few hit the mark, most run the gamut of failure from half-hearted to bizarre. The next time Cuomo puts the band on hiatus, maybe he should keep them there.