After a 89 hour binge-watch of Toddlers and Tiaras with the occasional bathroom break and need for sustenance, I came across these ads from PBS-affiliate Thirteen mocking reality shows with the snarky tagline: “The fact you thought this was a real show says a lot about the state of TV.”
Fake reality shows like Knitting Wars, The Dillionaire, I’m Married to A Mime, Bayou Eskimos and Bad Bad Bag Boys were made into fake promo posters along with insanely clever titles.
“It’s sew on.” I almost spat my Diet Coke out from laughing.
Come on, who wouldn’t want to see hyper-competitive grannies jumping off their rockers at each other? Or to see how a mom juggling children and her part time job also juggles the inevitable silence of her husband? Or troubled teens hiding in the dairy fridges ready to frighten unsuspecting customers?
And I really like pickles, so they deserve as much exposure as possible.
But what is the current state of TV?
To PBS, “quality” programming is overridden by the likes of Duck Dynasty, The Bachelorette and those loveable Kardashians. And according to Screen Rant, the number of reality shows have grown from 4 in 2000 to 320 in 2010.
That’s enough duck calling and Kardashian tears to last a lifetime, but what is so wrong with people watching something they enjoy?
I like to consider myself a cultural mutt. I hover in the middle brow by liking a multitude of high brow things like literature, musicals and art but I like to dip down into the “dirt” by absolutely loving mindless pop music and even more mindless television and movies. White Chicks is one of my favorite movies, if we are being honest.
Because that’s what entertainment is: being mindless. Just for a couple of hours, unless you frequently binge-watch like me, you clear your mind of all of troubles and anxieties just to see people simply…do and exist.
Take the fake reality show hit Bayou Eskimos, for example. These brave souls have ventured from the chill of Alaska to the muggy waters of New Orleans to step out of their comfort zones. Hilarity ensues as they confuse a rundown grocery store for a herd of polar bears. This makes people laugh. They are enjoying themselves.
Imagine that! Someone actually choosing what to watch and enjoying themselves!
To mock something people love is purely pretentious. To call Downton Abbey “quality programming” is just annoying. Take a sip of your aged wine, crack open your leather bound books and take a seat in your plush, velvet chair. Calm down.
Thirteen is discrediting the lives of people who star in reality shows and the taste of Americans as un-quality. Well, Thirteen, I think your attitude is un-quality. Take that.
So everyone, keep watching what you want. Don’t be ashamed of your tastes. We’re human. We are allowed to like as many things as we want.
If you want to continue to see Benedict Cumberbatch’s terrifying face on Sherlock, then do exactly that. And if you want to vicariously live through a toddler perusing her pageant dreams, go right ahead.
Nobody can stop you except your family members dragging you away from the television. Not speaking from experience, of course…