Suits is finally back! The hiatus was long and lonely, but Season 3 is here and picks up right where we left off.
We open with a quick shot of Mike sleeping in his apartment, then see everyone gathering in the conference room as Jessica and British Merger Man (he’s my new favorite) make the merger official. Suddenly, Rachel butts in and exposes Mike as a fraud. He freaks out, only to awaken and realize it was a dream. The first time I watched this, I was definitely fooled, but the opening shot of Mike sleeping should have clued me in.
In present day, we see Harvey in his office, looking over a contract. Donna comes in (I’ve missed you Donna!) and tells Harvey that he needs to make a decision about Scottie –whether he wants her to stay in the U.S. or London. Harvey says London. Ouch.
Harvey goes off to Brooklyn to finalize the contract he was looking over earlier. It looks like he’s eating a donut as he gets off the elevator. Man, now I really want a donut. Harvey finds the manager of the basketball team his client, Darren Williams, is going to be signed to, and asks for triple the amount of the original contract. Harvey says if he doesn’t agree to it, Darren will join the Dallas Mavericks. Manager Man says Mark Cuban won’t pay that much but Harvey disagrees, telling Manager Man to call Cuban, except “oh wait –he hates you.” I’ve seen enough episodes of Shark Tank to know Harvey’s probably right –Cuban would totally hate someone who seems as lame as Manager Man. Harvey threatens Manager Man with some “thing” both he and Cuban know about that causes MM to fold like a cheap suit (much like the one he’s wearing).
Jessica is waiting back in Harvey’s apartment when he comes home. She gives him a hard time about the methods he used on MM but really, Jessica, since when has Harvey ever failed using those methods? Harvey tells her he bluffed and she gets irrationally upset, accusing him of trying to purposely fail and get fired. Shut up, Jessica. That’s what you pay Harvey to do and it’s what he’s good at. In the end, Harvey wins as he sees that MM caved. Oh, we find out he manages the Nets. That would’ve been nice to know when I was trying to figure out a name for him. Oh well. Go Harvey.
We see Mike at Rachel’s door. Ugh, these two. Sorry to all the Mike/Rachel shippers out there, but the makeup/breakup carousel they were on all of Season 2 really made them unbearable. We see Rachel’s spotless apartment as she tells Mike she doesn’t want him to comment about how messy it is. Ha! Rachel totally would be freakishly clean. Mike stares at the bed. Ew. Rachel tells him it’s not going to happen, and he asks “now or never?” Never, please, for my sanity. They argue. Rachel is self-righteous, Mike is a doormat; the usual. Mike tells Rachel about his nightmare and has some cheesy line about his real nightmare being the thought of not being with her. She asks if he means it and he says he meant it from the day he met her. Um, what about Jenny?! Mike was totally into her then! I miss Jenny. Mike worries a bit about being exposed as a Harvard fraud and Rachel gives him a solution: to quit.
The next day, Mike walks into the office and sees Harvey and Donna. They both stare contemptuously at him. Awkward. He goes to Jessica and she praises him for coming through last season, although Mike clearly feels guilty about stabbing Harvey in the back. Jessica tells him a personal story that’s supposed to act as a metaphor for his current situation, but really kind of falls flat, although it seems to work on Mike. Try harder next time, Jessica.
Jessica walks by the Pearson sign and sees the name Darby being added to it. Although I love the addition of the Brits, Pearson Darby just doesn’t have the same ring to it as Pearson Hardman.
Donna walks into Louis’s office (I love scenes with these two) as Louis is having a meltdown about the lack of uniballs, his favorite pens. Apparently the new quartermaster no longer buys them for the office. Donna essentially tells him to get over it, then makes him wipe his face with his hands that are full of ink. My love for Donna knows no bounds. He ends up with a mustache that makes him look like a bald Hitler. It’s hilarious.
British Merger Man and Jessica have a conversation about a case he wants Harvey to take, although Jessica is against it. BMM wins in the end as he owns 51% of the company. Jessica goes to Harvey’s office to deliver the news that he’s on Ava Hessington’s case.
Rachel sees Mike’s new office and is, of course, angry with him for not following her every order and quitting as soon as she told him too. Calm down, Rachel. She tells him he doesn’t deserve to be where he is, and while I see where she’s coming from, Mike is completely capable of going to Harvard and getting his law degree the official way –he just chose not to. He also worked pretty hard for Harvey in the last year, so he has earned it, if in a roundabout way. Rachel should really tone down the bitterness.
Later, we see Mike looking at a letter of resignation with his name on it. Really, Mike? Where’s your backbone, honestly. He runs into Louis in the copy room, who accidentally sees the resignation. Mike tells him the reason he wants to quit is because Harvey now hates him. Louis tells Mike about how Harvey used to be an independent Superman back in the days of Pearson Hardman, but that now he’s Batman, and Batman needs Robin. Aw. Louis tells Mike to help Harvey win his case and use our old friend, tech extraordinaire Benjamin, to figure out what case Harvey’s working out.
Mike goes to Benjamin and asks for a hard drive. Benjamin says no, but Mike gets him to admit that he’s been hacking into Mike’s personal computer and records the conversation, using it as leverage. Sucks to be you, Ben. Ben agrees.
Harvey walks into British Merger Man’s (oh fine I’ll call him Darby from now on, because Darby reminds me of Darcy and I love me some Mr. Darcy) office and asks him why he’s sitting around. Darby: “My dear fellow if I have to do work then I’m not doing my job.” Ha! That’s totally Jessica’s philosophy too, since all I’ve ever seen her do is sit around and delegate work to Harvey and Louis. Harvey tells Darby that he wants a deal –if he, Harvey, wins the Ava Hessington case, Darby has to fire him and get rid of the non-compete clause. Harvey tells Darby that he was fine with being loyal to Jessica until she accused him of trying to get himself fired. Darby agrees to the deal.
Donna finds Harvey working on the case, and hints that he might need help from Scottie, whom he just sent on a plane to London. Harvey catches Scottie at the airport and asks for help. Scottie is understandably pissed, and tells Harvey to tell her “something” –“something” in this case clearly meaning some sort of declaration of love. Harvey uses his charisma to charm her, and she agrees to help him. Usually I’d say Harvey just wrongfully exploited a woman who’s clearly in love with him and be outraged on her behalf, but she did literally ask him for it, so…
The saga of Louis and his uniballs continues as we see him angrily telling Norma to put some on his desk. Louis looks for his beloved bran bars in the kitchen but tragically, there are none left. Suddenly, we see British Louis from last season holding a bran bar and asking, “Looking for this?” I am so glad they brought back British Louis because he and Louis together are comedy gold. It turns out that British Louis is the new quartermaster. Louis goes to Donna for help and they realize they need to get rid of him. Can we please just get a spinoff with Donna and Louis and the occasional guest appearance by Darby and British Louis? USA, make it happen.
Meanwhile, Harvey visits the client, Ava Hessington. Someone has accused her of bribing a foreign government so she can create a pipeline. Harvey has all the other dirt on her, such as how she covered up an oil spill, thanks to Scottie. Harvey convinces her that he can help her and leaves, only to run into Mike. Mike tries to help Harvey with information he already has, and Harvey is more than a little harsh. Mike tells Harvey to “rip him to shreds” so he can forgive him, but I feel like to Harvey, Mike is past the point of forgiveness. Mike tries to explain that Jessica threatened him but Harvey retorts that he should’ve come to him: “You come to me, you tell me everything! That’s what goddamn loyalty is.” I see both sides here, but I’m kind of with Harvey on this one. He would have helped Mike out, despite Jessica’s threats. Either way, great job in that scene by both Gabriel Ross and Patrick J. Adams.
We segue to Mike at Rachel’s door, again. He tells her that he’s going to tell her everything and that at the end, they’re either going to be done or get back together, essentially. Guess she forgives him as we see them the next morning, in bed. Ugh. They canoodle and kiss while I go grab a bucket of bleach to drown my head in. The song “Bloodstream” starts playing in the background and I cry in horror, because that is one of my favorite songs and using it during a Mike/Rachel scene is nightmarish .
Onto more amusing things –Louis bribes Darby with expensive European things and asks Darby if he can become the new quartermaster instead of British Louis. Darby seems to be bought over.
Harvey and Ava meet with the attorney who charged Ava. Harvey tries to get a deal with him since he’s an old friend, but the attorney is running for office and needs to win the case. He refuses to give in and Harvey leaves angry.
Back at the office, Rachel tells Donna that Richard Gere is in the lobby, and they both run down to see him. Richard Gere, really? Mike comes in during this time and puts a file on Harvey’s desk while Donna’s away.
British Louis comes into Louis’s office with his uniballs and bars. Louis is happy for about ten seconds, until British Louis informs him that there are quartermasters for inanimate and animate things –since Louis is in charge of the inanimate things, such as his beloved uniballs, British Louis now has control of all the associates. British Louis is the new and improved version of Louis, with a cool accent. Doesn’t he also look a bit like a skinnier version of Mr. Bean?
Donna comes by to give back the file Mike put on Harvey’s desk, telling him the only way Harvey will forgive him is if Mike uses a time machine to undo what he did with Jessica. Mike rightly points out that Harvey needs the file, regardless of his feelings towards him. Donna tells Mike that he did this to her too, and that she’s had his back since day one. Mike reminds Donna about the lost file incident last year, but Donna retorts that she did what she did for Harvey, and she got fired for it. Ouch. Tough love from Donna, but Mike needed to hear it.
Mike finds Benjamin outside the office and makes a peace with him, offering Ben the recorded tape for friendship. Aw, Mike’s growing as a person.
Donna gives Harvey Mike’s file, which Harvey immediately sees to be useful. Harvey goes Richard the attorney and attempts to get him to back down with the new information, but Richard points out that Ava did do the crime, so he’s not persecuting an innocent person. The cases on Suits always have gray morality, which is interesting. We’re supposed to root for Harvey, when in fact his client is guilty, as both he and Richard know. In the real world, we’d probably be rooting for Richard.
Harvey runs into his old “friend” Cameron Dennis, sporting an ugly mustache, who has apparently taken over the case for Richard due to Richard’s conflict of interest. He and Harvey subtly threaten one another.
Mike calls Jessica down to his office. He tells her about his and Harvey’s rift, and Jessica is basically like “that’s your problem.” Wow, she really is a ‘kill or be killed’ type of lady. Mike tells Jessica he wants to give up the new office and go back to his cubicle. Jessica looks impressed in spite of herself.
Final scene. Harvey goes and sees Darby. He says he wants to renegotiate the deal –if he wins the Hessington case, he wants Darby to back him for managing partner and take down Jessica. Ooh, it’s going to be interesting to see how that plays out.
So, what did you guys think of the premiere? Do you think Harvey will forgive Mike anytime soon? And what was funnier –Louis’s Hitler mustache or his obsession with uniballs? Comment below!