Intro:
As the show starts, Craig Ferguson is talking to his robot side-kick, Geoff Peterson. Ferguson throws a piece of wood against the fake fire and asks his sidekick why he is reading Arnold Schwarzenneger's biography. The host and his side-kick make fun of Schwarzenneger for a few minutes. Then, Ferguson tells Geoff that every time he rings a bell on Geoff's podium, the pair has to pretend to be German.
Monologue:
"It's a great day for America, everybody," Ferguson exclaims. He mentions that the world's largest Star Trek convention starts in Las Vegas today, and then, argues that Star Trek conventions aren't lame, despite what many people think. For example, he says, there is a lot of good food. Next, Ferguson says that the Great Train Robbery occurred fifty years ago today. Ferguson says this is important to him because his father worked at the post office back then and was scheduled to load the very train that was robbed. However, his father called in sick with the flu that day.
Ferguson says that in order to pull off a crime like that, more than thirty criminals had to be involved. He jokes that one guy was actually retired but couldn't resist the "money and adrenaline" from taking one last job. "His name was Jay Leno," says Ferguson.
Tweets and Emails:
Ferguson presses the bell, and he, along with his robot, pretend to be German. The first message is from Terry in Marleton, New Jersey. Terry asks if Ferguson has any recommendations for places to eat for dinner in Los Angeles. Ferguson moves on to the next question after asking Geoff and a producer if they have places they like to eat but without revealing the names of those places. The next message is from a viewer who asks why Secretariat is alone all the time. Ferguson says Secretariat is not alone all the time. Another viewer asks how often the studio floor gets buffed and waxed.
First Guest:
James Marsden stops by the show to promote his new movie, 2 Guns. Ferguson asks Marsden if he owns guns. Marsden says that he doesn't have guns. Ferguson asks if actors are trained in the proper use of guns. Marsden laughs. Ferguson starts talking about how much he loves New Orleans and how he got two tattoos whilst he was in town for the Super Bowl. Marsden says that he likes New Orleans too and that the city has a haunted feel. After a commercial break, Marsden says that he studied broadcast journalism in college.
Second Guest:
The second guest is Meghan Markle who is starring in the television show, Suits. Markle says that it is about a guy who is pretending to be a lawyer and that her character is a paralegal. Markle says that she went to Northwestern, where she double majored in theater and international relations. She says that she worked for the US Embassy in Argentina for a while. Ferguson asks her if she can speak any languages other than English. Markle says that she studied French for eight years but that her French has deteriorated a lot.
Photo courtesy of CBS.