When Springfield residents come together for a funeral, Bart acts up at the funeral, prompting Marge to think that it must have been her KISS phase that triggered Bart's mischievous behavior.
In the flashback, Homer dresses as one of the KISS members and says to Marge that this is the weirdest pregnancy craving ever.
Back at the funeral, another town resident, Kent Brockman, recalls when he was covering The Springfield Peach Parade and one of Cletus's daughters gets lice from the peaches.
Homer thinks back when he made a bad financial choice by selling all his Apple stocks to buy a fancy bowling ball at Alley McBalls. At the funeral, Homer listens as Reverend Lovejoy tells the churchgoers to take out their Apple gadgets to better enjoy his sermon, while Homer looks solemnly at his bowling ball under a cowboy hat.
Mr. Burns tries to console Homer just a bit, but Homer points out that Mr. Burns probably doesn't have any regrets. The richest man in town lets on that some girl broke his first heart.
Reverend Lovejoy questions behind the podium if anyone doesn't have regrets to which Principal Skinner's mother raises her hand.
"Really, Mother?" Skinner asks.
Mother puts down her hand and admits that she forgot he was there.
Outside of church, Bart sits atop Milhouse's shoulders and puts on Reverend Lovejoy's robe to mess with the collection plates. Marge automatically thinks it's her fault for Bart's behavior.
When Mr. Burns sees Bart acting up with Milhouse, he reminisces about his time with Lila in Paris. Mr. Burns had proposed to the lady who sold crepes and posed nude for him. Sadly, Lila runs away from Mr. Burns after he reveals his true nature.
Meanwhile, Kent Brockman's past further reveals his sacrifices that led to his less than successful career now, compared with his former famous colleague’s career.
Elsewhere, Mr. Burns rekindles his romance with Lila as Smithers waits for him at the car.
Kent Brockman drives into the parking lot for Channel 6 news and mutters bitterly before spotting Bart in a basket of balloons floating about. Bart yells for help, which makes Kent think that this could be the one news segment that could jumpstart his career again, but can it really?
In addition, will Mr. Burns love life burn eternally or eventually burn out? For once, will Marge not blame herself for Bart's choices? Lastly, is Homer still regretful he sold those Apple stocks?
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