Now that our stomachs are full to bursting and before the post-turkey coma starts, let’s talk a bit about The X Factor. I’ve had my qualms about the show since auditions, but, for my money, the season completely jumped the shark last week when Khaya Cohen, the most talented and unique singer of the season, was eliminated. The week before, ultra-talented country-pop crooner Rachel Potter hit the road long before her time was up. What’s left? A couple of cowboy Abercrombie models with iffy harmonies and some wannabe pop acts. That’s harsh, perhaps too much so, but I’m not totally wowed by almost anyone left.

Perhaps this week will change that and a new frontrunner will emerge. It’s big band week, which means these singers will be covering amazing American standards. But it also means that almost every act will be in virgin territory when it comes to song choice. Plus, each act will be performing with a (drum roll, please) real band, which will say a lot about each singers’ stage presence and professional ability.

Because of the holiday schedule, I’m going to shake things up and recap BOTH the performance and elimination shows, but I’ll make it very clear when I switch as to avoid any spoilers.

Rion Page: * * ½
Rion’s X Factor journey has had some very high highs and some very low lows. Last week, Rion pulled out a simple and simply sublime performance thanks to some laid-back staging and a beautiful song choice. Unfortunately, what comes up must also come down and Rion’s performance this week, singing John Anderson’s “Swingin’,” was a large step down. The bluegrass/big band smorgasbord of a song was just dull and pageant-y. But, beyond that, Rion’s vocals were strained, pitchy and out of breath due to some needless choreography which made the 13-year-old bounce all over the stage. The judges somehow loved her, but, to tell you the truth (and I really don’t mean to sound like a snarky, superior jerk), I haven’t really listened to them since the Four Chair Challenge.

Restless Road: * *
First of all, I like “Life Is A Highway” (even though it makes me think of Cars, the weakest Pixar series) and think it’s actually a pretty decent song choice for the boys; like “Somebody Like You,” it’s a memorable, fun rock song with country sensibility. What it has to do with big band is anybody’s guess. Isn’t it as close to big band as “Swingin’” was to dubstep? RR performed it just OK. Parts were fine but the bridge was terribly sloppy and out of tune while Colton, singing lead, had some weird, throaty tone that was closer to Kermit The Frog than Tom Cochrane. Like I’ve said what feels like a million times already, I just don’t get this prefabricated, painfully average trio.

Jeff Gutt: * * * ½
While, genre-wise, “Life Is A Highway” might have been a head-scratcher, Muse’s cover of “Feeling Good” was a natural choice for Jeff. It combined rock with big band flawless and is a terrific tune on top of it. Really one of my absolute favorites. Problem is, this arrangement of “Feeling Good” alone has been heard on many, many other reality singing shows, most memorably by Adam Lambert a few years back. Now I know it’s stupid to compare almost anyone to Adam, who has a superhuman range, but, for the sake of the obvious comment, Jeff didn’t live up to Adam’s. But he did do a very solid job on a vocally difficult song. Jeff was on pitch, had some great raspy moments and kept my attention all the way through. While it maybe wasn’t his best performance, despite what Simon said, it was a very solid effort.

Josh Levi: * * * *
Despite the bizarre phone-booth-and-dancing-cops aesthetics last week, Josh’s actual singing and performance keep getting better and better. This week, performing Bruno Mars’ throwback jam “Treasure,” was his best performance by a country mile. He had such great, youthful energy yet performed the Singing In The Rain-esque number with old-school charisma and charm. A few weeks ago, I remember writing that I didn’t “get” Josh. Boy, that’s changed.

Carlito Olivero: * * * *
Carlito should have gone home last week instead of Khaya, plain and simple.
So, that being said, it was time for Carlito to have a moment to shine. ¡Ay, caramba! did he hit the nail on the head this week. Ricky Martin’s Latin guilty pleasure track “La Copa de la Vida (The Cup of Life)” was the perfect Spanish crossover song for Carlito and was just plain fun to watch. It featured a Vegas-y production, killer horn section and, above it all, a surprisingly good vocal from a performer who just seemed to be having a ball.

Alex & Sierra: * * * * ½
I don’t know what is it with this show. They vote out the best singers, praise the mediocre ones and criticize the truly talented. I loved A&S’ big band cover of Taylor Swift’s “I Knew You Were Trouble.” On paper, it seemed like a terrible song choice, but they made me love it. Sure, it sounded very little like the original, but since my favorite version of that track included screaming goats (remember that blip on the internet meme timeline?), that’s fine with me. The production, right out of a Ed Sullivan Show rerun was retro yet hip and the vocals were spot on. It was their best vocal performance in weeks.

Lillie McCloud: * * * * ½
Going into the show, I would have thought Lillie would mesh the best with the theme. And, in a way, she did. Her vocals on “Summertime,” the Porgy & Bess standard, were pretty spot-on. Did they beat Fantasia’s Idol performance which set the standard for that song? Not quite. But Lillie’s voice soared with a kind of technical perfection not reached by any others tonight. Sure, her performance was a bit dull, a bit dated and, dare I say, cruise ship-y, but I don’t really care. Lillie isn’t trying to be “current.” She wouldn’t release a Beyoncé-like album. She’s her own artist and I applaud her for sticking to her guns.

Ellona Santiago: * * * ½
Her pre-performance package gave Ellona some much needed heart and warmth. She’s been coming off as stiff and detached for quite a while, so it was nice to see the person behind the big, brassy voice for a change. Speaking of that voice, Ellona showed it off quite nicely with Jesse J’s “Mamma Knows Best.” Problem is, the Jesse J tune is incredibly difficult vocally and the demanding choreography didn’t really allow her enough time to breath and focus on her runs. So the less strenuous parts of the number were very strong while others were forced and flat. It may have been her best performance yet, but it wasn’t a game changer in the ways that Josh’s or Carlito’s were.

After everyone sang, I’d send Restless Road and Rion home. But my guess is that Lillie and Ellona will take their final bow.

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Elimination Results:

As predicted, Lillie McCloud is voted off right off the bat. It’s sad, but not surprising. She’s an incredible singer but X was the wrong platform for her as it kept trying to make her into something she’s not and this tween crowd is not her key demographic by any stretch of the imagination.

First in the bottom two was Rion, who performed Pink’s “Perfect.” The country cover seemed to take the wind out of the song’s sail and the whole thing just seemed dull and surprisingly blasé for being a “Save Me” song. The whole thing, too, was very pitchy and shaky.

Next, singing Bruno Mars, was Josh. Where Rion’s performance felt shaky and lackluster, “If I Was Your Man” was perhaps Josh’s best vocal performance to date. He nailed the runs and infused the somewhat whiny number with genuine emotion.

In the voting, Demi voted to send home Josh, Paulina voted for Rion, Kelly voted for Rion and Simon voted for Josh. This means it goes to America’s vote. Which also means Rion, the cute, inspirational, all-American, God-loving teen, would be safe.

And, yes, I was right. Sadly, Josh was sent home. I’m tired of complaining about X Factor so I won’t complain about a show whose voting is incredibly tone-deaf once again, but at least Josh went out on a high note. And at least I still have Alex & Sierra to root for.

Image Courtesy of Fox