With all the recent madness on Jane the Virgin this season, we thought a “Top 10 Things That Have Happened” list might be helpful before diving into this week’s episode.

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So, here goes:

1. Jane was artificially inseminated by her gynecologist. Therefore, she is literally a pregnant virgin. As strange as it sounds, we’ve somehow come to accept this as fact.
2. Jane was engaged to her long-time love, Michael, who was cool with the whole waiting ‘till marriage thing and raising Jane’s illegitimate non-love child. Except they recently broke up, because Jane started falling for the father of her accidental child, Rafael. Note that Rafael is unbelievably wealthy and owns this incredible hotel where Jane happens to work as a waitress. Michael is some sort of detective, which is cool, but not as cool as owning a hotel in Miami. #sorrynotsorry
3. Rafael just divorced his crazy, foreign wife, Petra, who turned out not to be who she said she was and is actually some chick named Natalia who has been running from this scary, drug cartel-ish dude for years. (Apparently he’s super psycho and poured acid on Petra/Natalia’s mom one time. We still are confused as to why she’s in a wheel chair though? TBD).
4. Michael won’t let go of the idea of him and Jane and even told Jane’s mom, Xo, that he thinks they’re meant to be together. Oh, the trials of young-ish love. However, he’s been boning his partner who is now really pissed because she saw Michael tell Jane that he still loves her.
5. Meanwhile, Rafael’s sister, Luisa (aka the gynecologist who inseminated Jane), has been sleeping with their stepmother. And because Luisa was about to tell her father what was going on between her and Rose, Rose completely screwed Luisa over and had her committed to a mental hospital. Normal? We think not… Normal on Jane the Virgin? We think so…
6. Michael and his partner have been trying to track down some intense, face-less drug guy named Sin Rostro and because Michael obviously hates Rafael for stealing his woman, he’s doing everything he can to somehow link Rafael to the scandal. Last week, he even found this creepy hospital room in the basement of the hotel where the drug cartel was apparently performing plastic surgeries to make their men unidentifiable after they commit certain crimes.
7. This may all seem like a crazy, telenovela to you, but we assure you…it sort of is. Which is convenient, since Jane has just recently reconnected with her long lost father, Rogelio, who happens to be a famous telenovela star! Last week, Jane accepted a writing internship with Rogelio’s studio, but she sort of failed and decided to stick to teaching at the Catholic school that has been passing out Virgin Mary coins with Jane’s face on them. Cute or creepy? We’re really not sure.
8. Rose overhears her husband, Emilio talking about transferring 5 mil to some off shore account. Which forces her to go visit Luisa in the looney bin and find out more. Based on what Luisa tells her, she starts to believe that her husband might be Sin Rostro and tells Rafael! GASP.
9. Also, something weird is going on with Rogelio’s assistant, Nicholas, and screenplay writer, Dina. But we don’t really know what yet.
10. And did we mention that Petra is currently hiding out in the Penthouse thanks to her one-time fiancé, Lachlan. However, he’s up to something sketchy, so we shall see how that turns out.

As we all know, each episode starts out with a flash back to some point in Jane’s life where she learned a lesson that will somehow apply to what happens in the episode. This week, a young Jane lost her grandmother’s favorite earrings. But, her grandmother teachers her that nothing is unforgivable when it comes to family.

Cue Rafael saying he’ll never forgive his sister. See what they did there?

While Rafael and Jane are having breakfast, he finds out that Petra has been shirking her responsibilities as event planner. What he doesn’t know is that she’s been trying to hide out until Lachlan returns from wherever Lachlan is always sneaking off too. Rafael threatens not to pay Petra unless she attends her meetings. As you can guess, she will now be attending meetings - like, all day, everyday, if she can…

Jane was sort of conned into sticking with the writing position for Rogelio’s show. Dina asked her to write an entire episode! But, she obviously has some sort of ulterior motive. Guess what it is? Rogelio is getting fired! They wrote him out of the script and put Jane as the writer to soften the blow! Rude.

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Meanwhile, Xo is trying very, very hard to stick to her promise to God of not letting a man between her legs without a ring. We swear she really phrased it that way when she spoke to God himself.

When Petra goes down to the lobby for her afternoon meeting, Rafael stresses the importance of the rich client she’s about to meet with. But, when the client turns around, it’s Milos, the insane ex-lover she’s been hiding from for years. Dun dun duhhhhh. We have to say, Petra speechless is priceless. Girl had it coming.

Also, let’s take a moment to LOL at the fact that while Milos reminisces about the night he threw acid on Petra’s mother, he says he loved how Petra was always stopping to pick up coins worth less than half an American penny off the ground. It was this quality that kept him from throwing acid on Petra herself. What an endearing quality to seek in a woman, Milos.

He also explains that he has since then attended anger management classes. “I am sorry I threw acid at your mother.” Words every woman dreams of hearing. “But, she lied to keep us apart,” he yells as he punches the table. His classes were clearly highly affective.

In typical JTV fashion, Jane finds Petra crying in the stairwell; upon which Petra reveals all her secrets to Jane. Given all the pregnancy hormones, Jane feels sorry for Petra. But then, who doesn’t feel sorry for their current boyfriend’s crazy-ex-wife who one time may or may not have helped killed someone?

Jane and Rafael go to visit Luisa in the nut house where Rafael decides it’s a good idea to divulge his hunch that their father might be Sin Rostro. It’s obvious that Luisa knows something by the way her face lights up and by the letter she sneakily gives to Jane to hand over to Rose.

Meanwhile, Michael sneaks into a plastic surgeon’s office and finds records linking Emilio to the underground tunnels.

Jane has written the script for her father to die and be cut out of his own show. His assistant finally reveals that he’s been working for months to get Rogelio fired so that he could become the star of the show. The nerve!

And in a shocking turn of events, like actually shocking for once, Milos is not a liar! Petra’s mom is and she can walk! Mystery solved.

Just like always the story from the beginning comes full circle. As Rogelio’s son on the telenovela stabs him, Rogelio speaks the words that Jane’s grandmother said to her when she lost the earrings, “You are my flesh and blood. There is nothing you could do that would be unforgivable to me.”

So how does it all end? Emilio goes to meet Rose to tell her that he’s moved up their trip. But, just as they’re about to do the deed, she releases a bunch of cement on him and then calls Rafael pretending that his father never met her!

And so the truth is revealed!

Rose = Sin Ros(e)tro. O M G.

Check out the promo for next week’s episode:

Tune in to Jane the Virgin on The CW, Mondays at 9pm