Kimmy is turning 30, but our favorite Kimbicile doesn’t have a recent ID. In order to get alcohol for her birthday party, she asks a random guy on the street, who tells her to get in his van for some better stuff. Thankfully, Titus is on his morning run and saves her from going into another van.
Thus starts another looney episode of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. While Jacqueline misses out on the fun in “Kimmy Has A Birthday!,” the episode does set up the rivalry between Dong and Logan. Plus, we finally get to meet Kimmy’s family!
After the title, Kimmy and Titus are walking down the street, when Kimmy asks Titus what he got her for her birthday. Titus says that adults don’t get presents, but Kimmy thinks Titus is just saying that to avoid having to buy her one. He gets out of it by telling her that he’ll write her a song.
When they arrive at the apartment, they find Kimmy’s stepdad Randy (Tim Blake Nelson) and her half-sister Kymmi (Kiernan Shipka). Randy is an officer in Kimmy’s hometown and was never able to find the bunker. (It turns out that an FBI pig discovered the Mole Women.) He has a knack for losing things, including Kimmy’s mom. By the way, Kymmi absolutely despises Kimmy. Kimmy refuses to let them in the apartment and doesn’t want them in her life because they remind her of Indiana.
In the apartment, Kimmy tells Titus, “Tonight is more than just a party,” which is his favorite sentence. She wants it to mark the first night she becomes an adult. She also finds out that Logan has left her his first present for her, which is - sadly - just clothes. Logan is planning on giving her a whole group of presents during the day.
Cut to a quick scene of Titus in full werewolf gear at the restaurant, where he is failing to write Kimmy’s song. He sees the pirate mummy taking off his wrappings and revealing a well defined torso. Even though he doesn’t even see the guy’s face, Titus invites him to the party.
Later, Dong shows up at the apartment with a hand-made bicycle. Lillian helps him sneak it in by faking a heart attack. Dong helps out with the party, but Kimmy is clearly disappointed that Logan isn’t doing anything. He still hasn’t been at the apartment, since his assistants are dropping the gifts off. Kimmy discovers that Randy’s present was a locket that was her mother’s.
When the party starts, Kimmy is instantly angry with Titus’ music choice. She apparently can’t tell the difference between house and electronica, so she asks for something with words. He puts on “Beat That Bitch With a Bat,” which is a real song, by the way.
Sadly, Randy and Kymmi show up to the party since Randy lost their car. Logan also finally arrives with “artisanal frozen water” in tow. But Dong also arrives with ice, which makes Logan suspicious that Dong might have feelings for Kimmy, too. They do get into a fight at the party, which doesn’t go so well.
Meanwhile, Titus is nervous that Torso is She’s All That-ing him. But when Torso finally arrives, Titus realizes that he is really an ex-boyfriend who is really angry with him.
Kimmy is struggling with Randy and Kymmi. She finally gets to confront Kymmi, who is angry that her whole life has been restricted because of Kimmy and she really doesn’t like not going to Olive Garden. She storms off, locking herself in a room. Randy shoots the doorknob (which wasn’t locked in the first place) and discovers that Kymmi has run off into the New York night. Kimmy insists that Randy go find her, but he’s scared of New York.
Kimmy is really disappointed that the whole party turned out to be about everyone but her. Titus, though, is happy about all the drama and tells Kimmy that this is what an adult party is like! Since Titus remembers that Kimmy doesn’t know anything about modern music, he performs Katy Perry’s “Firework” for her.
Right outside Kimmy’s apartment, Randy asks two men if they had seen a young girl. They ask him if he’s a cop (since they are really pimps) and to prove that he’s not, he shoots up heroin... a lot of heroin. Randy later comes back to the apartment with a prostitute, who is clearly not Kymmi. Kimmy recalls how much Kymmi wanted to go to Olive Garden, so they rush there.
At Olive Garden, Kimmy tells Kymmi that she knows what it’s like to lose your childhood. Kimmy apologizes and they finally find something to bond over. Kimmy notes that Kymmi still has a full life ahead of her and can still change things. She gives Kymmi half of the locket that has her picture in it. Randy loves them almost as much as he loves heroin.
This was a necessary character growth episode, as we finally got to meet Kimmy’s family. We also learned about the flaws in “Firework.”
You can check out our recap of the previous episode right here.
image of Kiernan Shipka courtesy of INFphoto.com