This episode, Empire: Chimes at Midnight let it all hang out in more ways than one.
The main plot centered around a hack on Empire's servers that leaked emails, Tiana's demo for "Me," and most scandalously, a nude photo Cookie sent to Angelo. So now all of the Empire has seen Cookie's Cookies. "They perky," Cookie claps back at the gawking Empire staff, which includes her now traumatized sons and an enraged Lucious who, once he composes himself, asks Cookie, "aren't you a little old to be sending nude photos of yourself?" No Lucious, Cookie will never be too old to flaunt what she's got, for you or anyone else.
Tiana is also personally affected by the leak. In addition to her unfinished single, a video of Gram trashing her after their recent breakup is released for all the world to see. We also learn that Tiana's over dramatic fake crying is NOT convincing. Musically, Tiana has bigger problems than her single leaking. Listeners are not here for "Me" and the song begins to get bad press. Xavier, who released the song against Becky's advice that "Starlight" was a better lead single, is freaking out over the decision and turns to Becky to help him fix it. Becky gives him advice on how to salvage the publicity for Tiana's album but does so on the condition that Xavier give her credit for the idea and get her back on Tiana's team. Xavier agrees, but you can already see him crossing his fingers behind his back.
The love "triangle" between Andre, Nessa and Hakeem continues. I use the term triangle very loosely as this is clearly an isosceles triangle or some type of other uneven/lopsided triangle that hasn't been discovered yet. Nessa is very clearly not checking for Hakeem and Hakeem's entitled attitude when it comes to Nessa is gross at best and flat out rapey at worst. Despite Hakeem's belief that Andre has forced Nessa to choose between them, Nessa has already chosen Andre. If her flirting with him at the Empire Xtream event during the previous episode wasn't enough, her seductive dancing toward Andre during her performance with Hakeem drives the point all the way home. Do yourself a favor, Hakeem. Take. The. Hint.
Cookie's relationship with Angelo also suffers . The Empire hack takes Cookie away from Angelo's mayoral race announcement, and she's accused of ruining his campaign (you know, the one that just started) when her photo leaks. In keeping with his promise from last week, Angelo prepares to go to bat for Cookie by firing anyone who disrespects her, but Cookie, now fully on board with what Angelo stands for, makes the decision to end their relationship. A hurt Angelo blames the press for the disintegration of his relationship with Cookie and in solidarity with Cookie and all women, takes off his shirt on national television during a press conference. Cookie realizes she loves Angelo, but is it too late? Will this be yet another doomed-from-the-start Cookie love affair?
Jamal attempts to kick his addiction to painkillers after Phillip, his PTSD support group leader, scares him with stories of stars who had opiate addictions. However, D-Major thinks that Jamal is off his rocker without his pills and says that he should go back on them. Jamal relapses and invites D-Major over. After the two share a passionate evening, Jamal blacks out and D-Major does what any reasonable adult who has just found their significant other unconscious in bed would do...he calls Phillip. Not an ambulance, not paramedics, not police, not even Cookie. His excuse? He didn't want it to end up in the blogs. Well, it's good to see homeboy has his priorities in order.
Tariq investigates Empire's hacking but also stumbles upon an email that may connect Lucious to the murder of Frank Gathers. To be honest, this is a bit of a reach. You find an email dated two days after Frank Gathers was murdered that outlines payments made to two unidentified individuals and out of that thin air comes a connection?
Lucious goes through a litany of suspects to determine who is behind hacking Empire. He briefly suspects Shyne but Shyne assures Lucious that he isn't a computer thug. Lucious also interrogates Vaughn (a.k.a French Montana), who tried to buy Empire Xtream back when it was struggling and was turned down. Lucious and Andre eventually set their sights on Tiana's ex Gram after the IT genius Andre hired to investigate the hack finds a keylogger in the studio where Tiana recorded. Tiana also lets it slip that Gram has computer skills and hacking abilities. Lucious and Andre send Shyne to rough Gram up and because of his work solving the hack, Andre is named president of Empire Xtream. Xavier once again takes credit for Becky's idea but Thirsty (who has reappeared for the first time this season) promises to teach her the proper way to get revenge. All is well in the Empire. But wait...
In the final scene of the episode, we learn that Andre is actually the person behind the hack. Andre paid Vaughn to hack Empire's servers to create a problem that only he could solve, thus earning him more power at Empire. Andre lets Nessa in on his plan because he believes that the only thing holding him back from taking over Empire is his lack of musical talent. But together, with Nessa, who has music in her blood, Andre feels they could be unstoppable. And not to worry, all you die-hard Rhonda fans. Andre believes that this relationship/conspiracy would be 100 percent Rhonda approved.
Other things we learned this week:
- Thirsty doesn't have rhythm.
- Gram is apparently supposed to be an evil Chance the Rapper.
- Hot Cheetos and red wine go together.
- The fictional music consuming public on Empire has piss poor taste in music--how could they not like "Me?"
and finally...
- Hakeem appears to be the only Lyon brother who hasn't inherited his father's affinity for fedoras.
This recap has been approved by Rhonda Lyon.